So here we are…the last day of 2020…we made it!
I think we can all agree that this year has been anything but predictable. I know that life normally has it’s fair share of ups and downs…but this year seems to have taken that to a whole new extreme. But despite all of this I am going to go out there and say that for me, this has been one of the best years!
I know, I sound mad…but hear me out
I came into 2020 in what can only be described as a pretty vulnerable place. I was living back at home and single for the first time in 10 years with no idea who I was or where my life was going to go next.
So I created the 30 before 30 list to give me some control, a sense of direction and to try and reconnect with myself. I had it all planned out, I was going to put myself out into the world and I was feeling motivated…then the universe had other ideas.
Let’s stay home…ALL YEAR!
Ok so that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but I’m sure that I’m not the only one who has felt like they have spent more time at home this year than ever. It’s certainly had its challenges and I’m not going to spend time talking about how I struggled…we all have. Looking back though there are so many things that have come out of these lockdowns that I am incredibly grateful for, here’s just a few:
- Living with my family – I honestly don’t know how I would have navigated this year without my family around me. We’ve laughed, we’ve cried and we’ve shared so many memories that I will cherish forever. We have always been close, but I feel like this year has really brought us closer and it’s very reassuring to know that you have such a solid foundation to support you.
- Giving myself space to process the past – Dealing with a breakup is a pretty big thing to go through…particularly when the relationship spanned a decade of your life. I thought the solution was to go out and do…but in reality, I need to slow down and actually process the whole thing. This year gave me space to reflect on the relationship as a whole, heal, and make peace with everything that happened so that I could actually move forward without any baggage.
- Prioritising myself – As someone who was always putting herself out there for others…this year really enabled me to reflect that energy onto myself. As the saying goes “you can’t pour from an empty cup” and this year I’ve been really focused on filling my cup with all the things and people that bring me joy and making sure that I am looking after myself physically and mentally…and whilst it’s an ongoing process I can honestly say I’ve never felt better!
- What’s REALLY important! – It’s not until you can’t have/can’t do something that you realize how much you missed it. I think this year has taught a lot of us what the real priorities are…and for me it’s about the people and the experiences as opposed to “things”. There are a lot of “things” I can adapt or make do without but nothing can beat surrounding yourself with good people you can have fun with. It doesn’t matter if it is a grand holiday or just catching up over a cuppa – those experiences are like gold and it’s something I definitely won’t be taking for granted in the future.
- Embrace the unknown and go with the flow – Ok so I’m going to be honest and say that I am still working on this one. I’ve always been a bit of an overthinker and can suffer from anxiety from time to time so letting go of control is something I often struggle with…so naturally, everything that has happened in my life this year has in some way tested this! The truth is that you only truly have control over 3 things – your thoughts, your feelings, and your actions – that’s it! What I’m starting to realise is that the more I focus on these 3 areas, the better and more secure I feel in my life. It doesn’t make it any easier or less stressful…but when I remind myself of this little fact I give myself so much power.
To sum it all up…
This year has been transformative! The Amy that’s writing this post is a completely different person to the one who started this journey a year ago…and I fucking LOVE her! She’s dug deep, faced all challenges head-on, and is on a mission to live her best life!
I’ve got good vibes about 2021. I have no idea what’s around the corner…and that’s both terrifying and exciting!
